What to do instead of spanking

Spanking has been in the news again. When your child misbehaves, sometimes you might think a swat on the behind is deserved. But, there are many better alternatives to spanking. Child development expert Pete Stavinoha, Ph.D., a pediatric neuropsychologist at Children’s Medical Center, suggests these other ways to interact with your child:

• Clear communication. Parents need to be clear about their child’s behavioral expectations, telling children consistently what will and will not be tolerated.
• Praise. Parents should tell their children when they are being good and ramp up this positive attention rather than emphasizing limit setting. This technique is what provides parents with the leverage they need when the child misbehaves, Stavinoha says.


• Teaching alternatives. This is basically instructing children on what they could do differently. Children don’t know all the “rules”; you have to tell them specifically what is appropriate.


• Time out. Stavinoha likens this to the opposite of the “time in” that should characterize the rest of your interactions with your child. A time out is not a punishment but rather is the turning off of all the positive attention usually given to a child, whether that means they sit in a corner or go to their room for a while. Time outs must be used consistently to be effective, and they will work best with kids who otherwise get plenty of positive attention every day.


• Reminders. This works especially well for younger children. Redirect them with a word or two when you see warning signs of misbehavior. This technique requires that the parent pay close attention to the child to look for signs of impending high-risk activity or to their becoming emotionally tense or frustrated. Rather than fuss at the child after misbehaving, reminders and redirection let you be more positive and may prevent some episodes of misbehavior.


• Negotiating. “When…then” is the optimal set of directions to give in this situation, especially if you want children to do something specific, Stavinoha says. For example: “When you’re done brushing your teeth, then we’ll play a game.” Make the task to be completed part of a positive set of directions.


• Withdrawal of privileges. Take away something the child really enjoys, like watching TV or playing computer games, but only for a short time. This technique is akin to grounding a child but the consequences must only be short term to be effective, Stavinoha advises.

Children's leading the battle against child abuse

While the conclusion of April may mean the end of temporate weather in North Texas, the REACH staff at Children's is making sure that the end of the "National Child Abuse Prevention Month" does not mean the end of child abuse prevention.

Through clinical care, education, research and public advocacy, the REACH team led by Dr. Matthew Cox is setting the standard for child abuse prevention in Dallas.

"We're just trying to get through each day to make a bigger impact in the lives of children," Dr. Cox said.

Read more about the REACH team's efforts in a story on childrens.com.

We're coming to Southlake

As The Dallas Morning News reported in today's paper, Children's is opening a new outpatient specialty care center in Southlake in 2011.


The new 34,000 square-foot facility will be located in Southlake's Carillon development. It will offer pediatric sports medicine, urology, gastroenterology, imaging and other services.

Since more than 500 Children's patients already live in Southlake and recent reserach projects that number to grow yearly, the need for the new facility is evident.

But if you need more convincing, Denise Stone can help. Her son, Billy, has type 1 diabetes, and the two of them have to make the trek from Southlake to Dallas regularly for Billy to receive the care he needs.

"When you've got a child with a chronic, life-threatening illness, you want the best medical care you can get," she said. "Having that right here in our own backyard would just give us so much peace of mind."

A voice for bedwetters

Nikki Perkis has a story to tell, and she wants people to hear it. Not many folks in her position would be so eager.

After all, bedwetting is a taboo topic for everyone from 5 years old to 95 years old.

But Nikki has a special motivation for addressing her bedwetting: If she never came to see Dr. Linda Baker at Children’s to get a solution, she probably wouldn’t be alive today.

Here’s her story.

Easter party at Children's

I loved Easter eggs hunts as a kid -- the anticipation of what the Easter Bunny would bring, the thought of colorful eggs, and especially chocolate Easter Bunnies. I was always amazed at how the bunny managed all that in just one morning. I never put together the fact that we had a lot of scrambled eggs in the days following the celebration.

On Sunday, patients at Children’s Medical Center in the Center for Cancer and Blood Disorders got a chance to experience that excitement. Libby Godlove and her husband Nathan Hazelwood sponsored an Easter party that included Easter baskets, cookie decorating and crafts, and, of course, an Easter egg hunt.

Watch the party video: